http://www.BreakupBrad.com -- Is It Hopeless? When To Give Up Trying To Get Your Ex Back
Sadly, there are some cases where it really is a lost cause. Thankfully, it’s rare that I receive an email from someone whose situation is truly hopeless, but it does happen occasionally so I wanted to make a video to help those of you who might be wondering if it’s time to give up trying to win back your ex.
So here is a short list of things to consider when trying to decide whether to continue pursuing your ex or not.
1.) How Long Has It Been?
There’s no magic formula to determine how long is too long when it comes to re-uniting with your ex. I’ve had clients get back together with an ex they broke up with years ago… and in many cases, time can actually be helpful, as it allows your ex to ‘forgive and forget’ and gives you a chance at starting over with a clean slate.
On the other hand, humans are naturally designed to conquer adversity and sorrow… your ex won’t spend the rest of their life thinking about you and dreaming about the happy times you had together. For the first few months after your breakup, your ex will definitely feel the pain and loneliness, just like you are… but if it’s been many months or even a year, then those feelings will begin to fade, and that will hurt your chances of winning them back.
If you and your ex were only together for a few months, and the relationship wasn’t particularly serious, then you probably only have a window of 2 or 3 months in which you will be able to realistically win him or her back. I know all of this sounds really technical and complicated, but if you watch the full-length video on my website, www.BreakupBrad.com, I explain everything you need to know about this subject, so head over there when you’re finished watching this video.
On the other hand, if you were married for years or your relationship was very serious and you spent a long time together, then you may be able to win back your ex after months or even a year apart. Essentially, the longer you and your ex were together and the more serious your relationship was, the more time you have to win them back.
2.) Have You Kept In Touch?
How much time has passed since your breakup goes hand-in-hand with another issue: how much contact have you had with your ex? If you and your ex continue to be ‘on and off’ or you’ve spoken regularly since the breakup (which, by the way, I don’t recommend), then the amount of time that’s passed since your initial breakup will matter less than if you haven’t spoken at all.
If your ex hasn’t taken the initiative to contact you for weeks or months, then that’s not a good sign. On its own, not hearing from your ex doesn’t mean you should just give up all hope, but if your ex isn’t trying to keep in touch or hasn’t taken any steps to reach out to you, then that’s definitely not a positive sign.
3.) Did The Relationship End Badly?
Some breakups are the result of major issues: cheating, excessive jealousy, constant fighting, verbal or physical abuse, and so on. If any of these major issues were the cause of your breakup -- or if the last weeks and months of your relationship were plagued with fights and bitterness -- then your ex probably isn’t going to be eager to get back together.
In my program, the Ex Factor Guide, I’ve included something that I call the “Clean Slate Email”... this is an email template that you can send to your ex to help get over some of these problems and erase any damage you may have done in the later stages of your relationship or since the breakup. For more details, please head over to my website, www.BreakupBrad.com, where you can watch my free full-length video and pick up a copy of my Ex Factor program.
4.) Was It That Great To Begin With?
This is another thing that many people fail to consider when they’re trying to get their ex back. I’ve made another video dedicated to this topic, so I won’t go into depth, but you need to ask yourself whether or not your relationship was awesome enough that you should even be trying to salvage it.
5.) Is Your Ex With Someone New?
If your ex jumps into another relationship shortly after you breakup, then you shouldn’t panic, because it’s probably just a ‘rebound’... and it won’t last.
But, if time has been ticking by and your ex seems to be happily wrapped up with someone new, then your odds of winning them back are going to drop by a significant margin.
*** More from Brad Browning: ***
Ex Factor Guide: http://www.exfactorguide.com
Love Learnings: http://www.lovelearnings.com